my past

haiiiiii
i hate exams.. hate it hate it hate it!!! my brains are going wrong liao. today doing maths test [ not after sch one] my brain suddenly went empty.. din know how to find the median.. sighh.. that provess.. my brain is too stuffed.. and i still have another half to stuff inside.. dot..
thk is so suay today. l0l. fire drill in the middle of the test. haha. i was kinda happy at first, cox i din know how to do [my brain went blank] but after that he say must stay back i was like.. wll.. its not our fault lor.. hai.. wats the use.. he's a big fat pig la.. but i hope i can score well in this test.. at least its a ray of hope?
today is hou liang's bdae~! happy burfdae mr hou. professor hou. hahaha. so funnae. haha.. he seemed so touched, esp when i sitting at the front i went to observe him when tkb, jocelyn and huiting read their letter.. he was like so touched. then the mooncake. L0L. so kewt. hahahaha. yuwen came in holding it with a candle stuck on it. lol. hahaha. hou liang is the best teacher we've ever gotten. i know others think he's sissy and all that, but he isn't. he's v nice. today he even said he felt guilty after scolding us cox we celebrated his bdae for him. i was sorta touched by that lor.. i mean.. he's already so tolerant and nice to us. it should be us who feels guilty. hahx. not like some other tchr hor, ought to feel guilty but think he's so good. haha. u know who i talking abt. who else??
haii. becox of maths test i reached home at 3.35pm today and after bathing, i ate and at 4.15pm went to do geog paper.. do until 5.30 i pia my music theory. then do until wana cry la so difficult and lack of time. lesson was at 6.30 .then i 6 went to eat then halfway recalled today no piano lesson. wl. wanted to kill myself. term break. haii. that's why i'm here. going back at 7.20 liddat to study chinese and science. haii. MUSt finish one more chapter of them each.
tan bc is such an awesome teacherr!!!!! just one short period with us today and she had enlightened me with 2 things. whereas after mrs wong spent abount half a year with us she hadn't enlightened me anything. =x must jia youu for science.. yeahh. everybody jia you! then 13th oct let's go crazzy. k box, movies, fun and freedom all cum le! ^.^

mi jia le zi wu -- 4 days
end of exams -- 14 days

posted by jinghan @ 9/28/2004 06:33:00 PM

hazzzz. feel bettat now. ha. went to watch qian qin bai fen bai. last episode today. ^.^ it was a nice ending. love it. so touching. haha. everybody happy happy. haha. not like xue tian shi. so many ppl die. lol. haha. mi jia le is coming next week! yeahhh.. so happy.. haha.. i hope i can understand the show. i guess i know enough backgrd info le ba? haa.
haiii. exams. hate itt. in the morn im practically slacking. din do anything just reading. pure reading. sighh. i really v scared. wan to pass well. wish me luck. everybody jia you.

posted by jinghan @ 9/26/2004 02:38:00 PM

urghs. i'm really upset. it's going to be a very fa xie type of entry la, so dun read. esp sum ppl will find it very diaox but i'm really v upset abt it kkaaes?
qiaojielih is a very sucky company. not becox of the yi ren [polly, dun be offended] inside. its becox of sun de rong and his biased ways. actually i've never liked qiao jie lih. i think the stars inside are all right la, over all. im just v bushuang at the way sun de rong does his things. i think he's a big, useless pig can?! he like everyday sit down qiao jiao and wait fer money?? he's so biased. he just uses people who can earn more money. like 5566? its a fact la, so 56 fans dun be offended. im not insulting 56. im just angry at sun de rong kkae? he really uses them. pls la. i know that toro does not have a lot of fans, but he still has, all right?? and there are ppl who really support him. even if he thinks toro wun earn money for him, he shdn't just leng mo him anytime he like. what does he treat him fer? a money bank that he can just throw away anytime he like? a toy? he is also human. he has human rights, ok? he's 24 this year and he has the right to like somebody! what's the problem?? dun tell me 5566 dun have fei wen? huh? Huh? Huh? and why doesn he 'cancels their names in his namelist?' ?? huh? becox 5566 can earn more money than toro. yeah, its a fact and i dun deny it. but this shows his charactor, isnt it? he's just a pigified money faced beast fine? qiao jie lih has a contract with toro and he cannot just leng mo him anytime he like. he doesnt care abt ppl's feelings. he said that he doesnt mind ppl having relationships. OH YEAH?? then why is he doing this? he's toro's manager in a way, and instead of speaking up fer him, he cancels his name in the namelist? WHAT IS THIS MAN??? he sucks. sucks sucks sucks sucksss!!!!!! PIG. USELESS PIG! I HATE QIAO JIE LIH. I HATE SUN DE RONG I HATE HIM HATE HIM HATE HIM! HE DOESN HAVE THE RIGHT TO STOP PPL FRM HAVING RELATIONSHIPS. TORO IS ONLY HUMAN ALL RIGHT? HE HAS THE RIGHT TO LOVE SOMEBODY. SO WHAT IF IT'S HIS SI MEI ZAI ZAI? IT MAY NOT BE TRUE. AND SO WHAT IF ITS TRUE? WHAT ABOUT ZAI ZAI? HAS ANYTHING HAPPENED TO HER? ITS UNFAIR. UNFAIR. 5566 has so many fei wen before. renfu getting married. xiao renfu coming. and what did sun de rong say? he didnt say anything. now, just a small fei wen about toro and he's sacking him or something???!!!! i hate HIM. HE SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS SUCKSSSS!!!!!
have an urge to cry. feel so sorry for toro. its almost heartbreaking. what will happen to his album? i suddenly have the same feeling when last year energy was in the trouble of breaking up. i still had hope. but the results is that toro really left. heartbroken last year. i wasnt even willing to face reality. now i sort of recovered liao, this must happen. again. what will the fans say??
hai. nobody will understand. becox this type of thing wouldn't ever happen to them. to those artistes they support. sobbss sobbs.. let's hope fer the best. toro, jia you. never ever give up. even if you decide to leave qiao jie lih and that piggified manager, i support you kkaes? dun be upset and give up with ur love. and if u wan to leave, join a less piggified company next time. jia youu. a lot of fans will still support you. it may not be thousands of them. or millions. but there will be fans who support you whole heartedly. jia you.

posted by jinghan @ 9/26/2004 01:10:00 PM

in school comp lab now.. just after english.. VERY DIFFICULTT!!! especially the compre.. duno watever shit they talking about... wat golden mussells.. siao la.. idiot.. i read thru 2 times before understanding.. summary i had 161 wordss.. i did 2 drafts.. haha.. i finished at 12.15pm.. almmost 12.20.. haha.. oni had 5 minutes to check cox i used up 40 min on compre and 45 min on sumary.. haz..
now is chinese and science le.. must pia.. geog is sucky too.. hai.. must wish me luck.. everybody yi qia jia you bahh. ^.^

end of exams: 13 oct -- 19 days
mi jia le zi wu: 3 oct -- 9 days

posted by jinghan @ 9/24/2004 01:17:00 PM

tml is english end of year and i feel like i'm slacking.
honestly, what to study? hai. except the formats. i duno wat i'm doing. sighxx. slacking.
after english we're dead. really dead. in 10 days after english, it's chinese. that's not too bad if we pia the remaining 6 kes that we haven't learn. it's like studying for a test, just that we have to revise the front part and compo and ying yong wen. the worst is science and history. we have no time la! then GEOG. so much things to memorize, killer la. and between geog and science and history there's oni a weekend. 2.5 days. how to finish??!
maths.. i hate maths.. i hate practising maths, and i hate mensuration. i'm weak in mensuration. maybe even weaker at it than algebra. the oni thing i like is graphs. duno why ppl dun like, maybe i'm different, but i think graphs is easier to do and a great way to score, becox the marks are usualy almost 10 marks for one full qns. i hate the x = ym + c thou, and those type of theory.. i hatee mensuration!!! sucks.. i think satistics and scale drawing sucks too.. i think polygons and symmetry are not bad.. standard form is just irritating.. algebra is scary.. but mensuration is tedious and difficult .. can compare to algebra.. haii..

posted by jinghan @ 9/23/2004 06:36:00 PM

wed.. finally a day when i reach home earlier..
common tests just now. geog was not too bad compared to maths. MATHS. i hate maths. i've never liked maths. i think i wun even manage a 10/40 for this paper can?? 1st qn 4 marks gone. 2nd qn all 3 parts i duno how to do. 10 marks, gone. add up = 14 marks gone. and still got e graphs?? i think i will oni get some of the graphs part correct. qn 1, 2, 3 maybe can oni scrape 2 or 3 marks. omg. can i even reach 10/40 la?? dead. im dead. stupid la.. so difficult!! i was like almost crying when i did the paper.. it's harder than thk's paper lor.. at least i managed to pass his paper. i dun think i will get above 10 for this paper.. the graphs cai how many marks, and sure got mistake also.. haii..
im v scared.. at this state i'm going to fail my maths paper.. yet the subj i hate studying/practising most is maths!! yucks. i think i rather do science than maths. =x but i hate both science and maths la.. HATE it!! it's the 2 papers that i most easily will fail and it's the 2 most important subjects!!!! sobbx..

posted by jinghan @ 9/22/2004 02:00:00 PM

music; tension - gan qing xian [she's the one]
i'm v tired today.. duno isit monday blues or not.. hai.. today go home i sat in front of that oliverish stupid childish guy frm maris.. cant stand his look.. so irritiating.... he's shorter than me and he's a guy... and he's so damn childish cant stand.. like pri sch boy boy liddat.. wl.. bleahx.. watever..
reach home did a bit of science.. read through chapt 1 and 2.. dun prepare to focus, just know the main points can liao, since oni 30%.. i try to do more on electricity.. errx.. and i finished colours. i memorised the entire colour chart.. not too bad la. pri colors: red, blue, green. red+blue=magenta, blue+green=cyan, green+red=yellow. ha. then right in the center is white, of cox. yeah. no more to learn. quite easy la.. my notes oni 2 pgs.. 1 sheet of foolscap..
HISTORY ROCKS!!!!!! only 5 chapts yeah man.. i tot need to study 1st semester de.. rocks la.. then liddat v easy le.. half the work.. hopefully geog also 2nd semester.. aiya.. cant de la.. but geog really alot.. i rather do history whole year and geog half year.. but betta than nothing..

posted by jinghan @ 9/20/2004 06:23:00 PM

bleahxx... studying rocks :) provided i understd. cox of the sense of satisfaction. hahax. i finished copying notes for colours and one chapt of history this morn! hahax.. din stop from 10.40am to 1.35pm. hax.. now slack a bitx..
imageless skins rocks! :P oh well.. since now i cant upload pix, i'll make do with them..
haix. i'm v worried.. can't finish science in time.. there's a lot la.. i like trying to pia now.. i finished notes of colours and dun prepare to copy reflection de cox i have le.. then left wat? sound? duno.. not sure.. then history i think at most one more chapt to go.. geog also left one chapt.. not too bad la.. im just worried abt science. it's the worst subj ever. and i have a great danger of failing. i got 53.5 for my mid year!!!! and streaming it's going to be harderr. die le la. fail science go combined-science class?? I DUN WANT. i rather go f & n class then combined-science la.
oh ya. im addicted to nan quan mama's song, wa jie. really addicted. haha. it rocks. i lurve it.. and i like tension's songs, so su fu.. listen le v peaceful and comfortable.. i like.. so i ask my mum buy 2 cds for me.. lolx.. tension story and nanquanmama.. she like.. "u like ur bro liddat, buy so much cds" .. hahx.. i v long v buy le la.. ok la..i mean. the last cd i bought was energy.. then it was wat .. jay chou?? then ... XUETIANSHI. oh well. i wun anyhow buy cd now.. my bro like every wk buy 2 cds.. lol.. but he one month earn $500 for NS la. oh well..

posted by jinghan @ 9/19/2004 03:00:00 PM

im v bushuang.. i hate studying.. i duno, i lost all my freedom.. today is fri and i was prepared to slack until night when i do two hours of science.. but i cant. not just me being uncomfortable, my mum is really angry as long as i spend one minute in front of the com. she called and when i said i wasnt doing homework, she became bushuang. went off to a string of words saying, exams are comng, u shd be studying ok.. I SHALL GO CRAZY IF LIFE GOES ON LIKE THAT! i mean, cant i have a break? i think ive been not bad for this wk, following my timetable. ive revised almost all the maths, left graphs oni. and ive started on science. now i understand light. ive finished notes for electricity. i have a small sense of satisfaction, and im prepared to do more this weekend. its not a lot, but compared to my usual slack life this is nubbad liao, can? instead of spending the whole afternn in front of the com, i was at my desk all time. i hate this type of life. my parents are still stressing me out. must i spend 24 hrs on my desk doing maths then they'll be happy? If i have to spend everyday like that, i rather die.
1 month. thats wat my mum said. less than one month oni, just study and dun play for the month.. PLAY? do i look like im having a nice time or realy playing like a pri one student?? im already feeling stressed. 1 month = 30 days and if i have to spend 30 days studying non-stop im going to die. dun need 30 days. just 1 wk and ill break down completely.

posted by jinghan @ 9/17/2004 03:35:00 PM

MI JIA LE ZHI WU
-by energy-
every sunday, 1pm to 2.30pm
SCV channel 56
quan dao shou bo

posted by jinghan @ 9/16/2004 07:19:00 PM

omgg.. its time to go CRAZY!!!
pengg.. woke up at 7.30am today go guzheng until 12 sth. then rush to j8 . energy had session at 12.. by the time i got there was like 1 plus.. frm the overhead bridge i caught the first glimpse of them - tall, in white, and the dj was talking so loudly i could hear... OMG.. then the worse lah.. i saw them at open atrium but i din know how to get there. i circled around j8 for almost half an hour before i found my way there? stupid..
bahx. so many ppl. i decided to queue. bought version 2 album, gong zai is kunda.. stupid, not more niunai le. his gong zi is most cute le.. lols.. haha.. then at the first the queue din move.. i stood under the sun at the same spot for almost 45 min before i got into the shade. so hot la.. ppl behind me queue second round liao.. hahx.. then yumin came and stand at the railing until i leave liao she still there.. polly earlier than me.. saw her go up.. SHE SHOOK ALL FOUR OF THEM"S HAND!!! ARGH I SO JEALOUS.. lolx.. i din manage to shake ahdi's hand.. idiot.. i was like the last 3rd row? then when i went up my legs were wobbling.. duno y not my first time in a auto session.. but just too excited lah.. first time i so close and can shake hand.. first person was ahdi. he wasnt looking at me, just talking to the other person.. i keep looking at his hand but dun dare to ask to shake it.. lol.. then next was kunda.. he was signing then i said, kunda wo ke yi wo ni de shou ma? then he look up and shake.. hahaha.. his hand v big ..
then shuwei was the only one who looked at me and smile automatically lah.. lol.. i was like, din plan to shake his hand becox i noticed he wun auto de.. then i said shuwei jia you, he auto stretch out hand for me to shake.. lol.. he wore a wristband or something.. then his hand v big and warm.. haha.. he's v nice.. cannot think badly of him le..
niunai v funnae.. he wasn't looking when he signed, he was talking again to other dj then i started pestering him and keep calling his name.. until 3rd time he stretch out his hand but nv look at me.. ha.. i shook it anyway.. duh.. he v cute lah... stop saying he's ugly cox he's not.. he xian chang damn cute and quite shuai too, really..
pengx.. i was like.. dun wan wash my hand after that.. i regretted not asking ahdi to shake hand!!!! stupid.. cud have done that.. i was just too scared la.. then in front that person also nv ask to shake.. she cried after that.. dot..
then raining.. the whole place a bit flooded.. i wear canvas shoes lah.. then my feet all wet.. idiot.. but better than those who wore slippers, even worse..
hahx.. energy just rocks lah!! i like their clothes.. singlet with vest outside.. lol.. shuwei was saying that we exams must get better than him.. then in the middle he suddenly stand up *screams frm fans* and say ahdi not feeling well *more screams* and then ahdi was like pointing at him and scolding him or sth.. lol.. then niunai say wan to rest.. then kunda stood up *screams again* . pause for 3 secs. he stood up on his chair. *screams* pause agian. then. he stood up on the table. LOL. screams again, of cox.. he's crazy.. then he told the fans becox he v stiff then stand up.. haha.. he's so cute.. he speak the least one la.. niunai is the noisest.. lol.. but he so cute.. his teeth soo cutee!! ahaha.. im crazy.. dotx...
hope energy have concert again soon.. cox my mum promised to let me go *hope she dun forget* and their next session!!! my hand was feeling so nice and warm after they shake it.. haha...

posted by jinghan @ 9/11/2004 09:00:00 PM

THURSDAY. ALREADY. crries * the holidays are passing just too fastt.. idiot lahx.. the maths paper i a lot duno how to do. i just finished section A for all three papers. haven touch section B. and there's blanks. a lot of blanks. HE's an stupid idiot lahh wl..
yah.. i did templates on blogskins and submitted them. nice? hahs. the picx are frm getty images.. hehex.. not bad leh still got ppl download. l0lz.. must go see. my id is still luvtoro-eg5.. hax
haix. stuppiddd lahhzzzz still got history!!! haven read yet. 30 pgs?? oh wels. okk..

posted by jinghan @ 9/09/2004 05:10:00 PM

Lord of the rings rockksss!!
haha. im crazy. marathon today siaz.. 10 - 12 sth i was copying geog notes. then after.. whoa.. watch lord of the rings fellowship of the ring (1st part) until abt 4.. then rest for 10 min continue watching part 2, the two towers until 6.40. hhaa. it rockks lah. so nice. hehe. i notice that other than legolas, aragorn also very shuai lah. hha. olivia is right. he's shuai. its a different kind of shuai. and arwen is damn beautiful lah can. the word is beautiful lah. not chio or pretty. hahaz.. the two towers damn nice.. hahaz.. its when bonds build.. then got wars.. rocksz.. fellowship of the ring got 4 vcds. the 1st 2 not so nice.. but the third and fourth one also v nice.. haaz.
then at 7 -9 going to watch yi tian tu long ji.. lol.. my eyes duno can tahan so long a not.. but now still ok lah haha..
holiday so much homework to do. the geog notes i copy 2 hours liao still got case study haven copy yet. wlz. tonight try to finish. then tml must do the maths hw he gave. and maybe some other stuff like reading up my science and history? hai. i think geog rocks lah, actually. haha. confirm i taking geog next yr. its the best humanities subj compared to lit and his? his is ok lah. but i nv know when i will fail or pass. i can get an A1 or a C anytime. stupid. lit is out lah. im nv gd at it. esp prose and poems.

posted by jinghan @ 9/04/2004 06:47:00 PM

i duno wat am i bushuang abt but im just v angry lah kaes? need to fa xie sometimes too. its all trivial matters but when 10 trivial matters add up together it will make u really pissed and moody and thats wat happening to me often this year.
small matters.
she can't come this wk. less laughter.
i wana play badminton.. nobody play with me!! sobx
i wana watch xuetianshi.. the vcd not with me
i wanna watch LOTR. too long. my parents sure bushuang.
i wanna watch TV. everybody's snatching it with me.
i wanna slack for the holidays.. so much hw. so much notes to copy.
i wanna write my stuff.. dun have reference bk.
bigger matters.
my bro's acting like he's the king.
my mother sides him.
my bro has no respect for me.
he treats me like his toy.
he scolds me and talk to me as though im just an animal. i dun feel like im an older sis. i dun have any pride in me at all.
my parents doesn care.
im really upset.
urgent and important matters.
im worried abt my science.
i dun understd anything she teaches. i dun like her. kan bushuang her. her handwriting sucks. and her teaching really sucks too.
im worried abt my maths.
i know im not stupid. but my brain is rusting. im scared.
im deterioriating. i know that very well. no need to remind me.
im worried abt almost everything.
i wanna get into the stream i wan.
i dun wana fail any subj.
i wanna pass well.
i wanna get gd results.
i dun wanna make my parents disappointed. i dun wan to make myself cry over exam results agian.
loads of things that cant be written down properly.
i cant express my feelings in words.
i know im stupid. it sounds stupid reading it from here. but it really isnt as simple as it seems. the small matters are entirely dotx and stupid, but the bigger matters and impt matters are really bothering me a lot.
i dun wanna have mood swings.
but i cant help it sometimes.
im sorry.
im really sorry.
but sometimes i wonder. why is it always me who says sorry? Has anybody ever said sorry to me before? Has anybody ever thought abt how i feel? how i would think?

posted by jinghan @ 9/03/2004 10:40:00 PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIUNAI!
haaxx.. niuniu is 25 today!!! ilu =)) he's soo cute.. haha.. and he's shuai sometimes and stop saying he's ugly. even if he's not shuai at all times he's cute and caring =)) entertainment news panweibo sing bdae song for him sing until zao sia.. lolxx.. lalalaxx.. niunai is my sec fav member.. hehehex.. his dance is superbb!! weex.. hahaz. happy bday niunai!! hope u get more shuai everyday =))
chinese test today. im going to die. yucks. the summary is damn difficult lah!! haix. 102 words. duno lahx. i cancelled a lot of stuff. my nei rong going to die liaox..
tml got maths test. dun think im gg to care since its a class test and i got 2 class test results ok de. graph one and the previous one?? i mean both touch A so shd be ok lah. just go learn formula or sth?? im v tired today. he just sucks. i ate my lunch at 4.50pm today. im so pro manx. hai..
holidays is comingg.. yeahx.. one more day tml and we're free! okk. 'free'. cox still got end of year coming up and tonnes of holiday homework. he just sucks lahx. say wat oni 2 qn and 3 paperrs. i hate it. streaming is coming and i am really praying to get into the double sci stream.. I DUN WANT TO FAIL MY SCIENCE!!!!!! URGHHH.. im worried about my maths too. my results are deteriorating!!!! my science and maths and english all sucks this term and im very well aware of it. and im dead worried. CANT FAIL MY SCIENCE OR MATHS!!! i dun wan to go to f&n stream or worse, combined-science stream. cries..
oh yeahxx. last night got a weird dream. hahax. dream abt mi jia le. lolx. the part where hero saved xiaolong. i realized i like hero this charactor a lot. haha. but in the dream he was wearing a grey cloak instead of a red one and he wasnt v shuai. haha but nvm lahx. rmbr last yr the night b4 toro's bdae i also dream of him. lolx. dotx. ok..

posted by jinghan @ 9/02/2004 05:30:00 PM